Now I am not typically one to shy away from a good deal, especially not the free ones! So the other day when I was leaving our local gas station and I saw a huge metal shelving unit sitting by their dumpster…my urge to save the planet kicked right in! I thought about heeving it into the back of my van as fast I could without anyone noticing, but to my dismay, I am not nearly as strong as I look.
So rather than flag down the nearest passerby in my daisy-duke shorts which by the way would have been way more exciting, I asked the store owner’s little boy and what I presume was his grandmother for help. I figured if I can not do it, surely a kid and his great grandma could heeve that sucker into van. The strength of a kid and his grandma should never be doubted.
It was a bit tricky trying to translate my message to my “crew” as this lovely older women apparently does not speak an ounce of English. So I am pretty sure that when I opened the back end of my van that happens to be full of reusable bags, piles of goodwill donations and general “kid crap” that she must have figured I was trying to convince her to either clean it or drive around town by the local retirement communities looking for some hottie grand-dad. And since I am not into the whole pimping thing, I decided to ask the kid if he knew English. He did and I was well on my way home with my new shelf before ever giving thought to the fact that I could have changed that women’s love life forever if I would not have been such a party pooper.
Now obviously this is a total score of a shelving unit, but SGD thought I was insane. I immediately grabbed my two kids to help but not without complaint I assure you. As we lugged the mammoth from the van to the front porch, I began rethinking my plan of bringing it home.
I could have taken it to recycling which was the *original* thought process. But what about all of our shelving needs at home? This too is recycling! I felt that by reusing this, I was indeed making a green choice. Hubs thought of it more like “what the h#ll were you thinking” and I believe his exact words were actually “what the h#ll were you thinking!!!” Oh and “like we need any more crap around here.” There was no shelf love. None at all. So I left it right at the front door while we contemplated.
(Fast forward one week later………)
Here is our shelf!
Notice anything in particular?
YES IT’S STILL ON MY FRONT PORCH!!!
Hubs and I have yet to agree on whether to keep it, or shove it back in the van. I want to take it back to the gas station and hubs says this is rude. We do agree on one thing however. This is becoming a Seinfeld episode.
Jerry: What are you doing with that shelf?
George: I’m taking it back.
Jerry: You’re taking it back?
Gerge: I’m taking it back.
Jerry: But you can’t do that. You can’t just take it back.
George: Why can’t I take it back. It’s there’s. I GOT it from them.
Jerry: What is that? You don’t just take and give back, take and give back. It’s confusing. It’s just weird. No one does that.
George: What? It’s their trash. It’s all about the origin of it. It came from them so it technically belongs to them. I’m just returning what’s rightfully theirs.
Jerry: Elaine, who’s trash is this?
Elaine: It’s their trash Jerry. It is. George is right, it’s about the origin.
I think it would be fun to toy with SGD and play the “George” card on him! Don’t you? hehehe.
Probably what I really will do is pawn it off on some poor soul who can’t say no or take it to recycling. So do you know of anyone who might need a shelf? 
It does have a sort of “urban charm” don’t you think. Perhaps a nice decorative piece for the front porch?
Image Credit:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://weblogs.sun-sentinel.com/news/politics/palm/blog/jalexander_375x375.jpg&imgrefurl=http://weblogs.sun-sentinel.com/news/politics/palm/blog/2008/10/_you_might_know_him.html&usg=__xQ-7AHc-IRLSgankQ5ZqCCaFnno=&h=375&w=375&sz=48&hl=en&start=20&sig2=2N9U0AevFgJx0ydNQnizIQ&zoom=1&tbnid=M50cNhRJ2X3jnM:&tbnh=148&tbnw=165&ei=S-VzTJPnJoT78AaYvaX1CA&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dseinfeld%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1199%26bih%3D621%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C587&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=352&oei=PuVzTJ2yEcGclgfGipnKCA&esq=2&page=2&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:9,s:20&tx=83&ty=95&biw=1199&bih=621
You are such a goober! Wait, have I called you thought before? How about a dork? Nope, think I’ve used that one too. Today I go with a dweeb(yes, I made up the spelling), but also very funny! I love that this bright red tacky shelf is sitting on your front porch! At least put it in the garage or something…if you have a garage. You must not have one or I’m sure that’s where it would be! LOL Oh, and you totally can NOT return that…..once you take the trash/junk, it’s yours! Love the Seinfeld analogy, very cute!
Awesome shelf!!! I think it would be super handy dandy!!
Perfect place to keep mud boots!!
I say keep it for outdoor storage…..or send it my way!
Nope. The worst thing is that we DO have a flipping garage! Ugh, that is in fact why I will take the “dweeb” badge in shame. LOL
Oh Melinda! It is YOURS!!! You must come over and pick it up yesterday!!! Seriously. Come over or call me!
I kind of love it. What about using it as a planter? Can’t you just imagine full of clay pots and lots of green? Maybe use the bottom shelf to store gardening tools and a watering can?
Ooooh, now that’s the kind of good thinking we needed! Love it! Are you volunteering then to come over and help make it all pretty and leafy!!! XOXOXO and thank you so much for commenting – you made me day!!!!
If Melinda doesn’t want it, we’ll take it. Just hollar at me!
HAHA! Too funny – i will indeed!
I like Moira’s idea, too. You are a stitch–maybe you should write for TV?!?
LOL! Love you girls so much – you are the best!! Does this mean we are going to have a girl party and plant lotsa pretty stuff all over this thing??? Cool! I’m in!!!
Sounds good to me!!!
Hilarious!! You nailed the dialogue.